playfulkitten - Funny Forwards

Humorous Definitions

High definition hilarity

• Adult - A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
• Beauty Parlor - A place where women curl up and dye.
• Cannibal - Someone who is fed up with people.
• Chickens - The only creatures you can eat before they are born and after they are dead.
• Committee - A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
• Dust - Mud with the juice squeezed out.
• Egotist - Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
• Gossip - A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.
• Handkerchief - Cold storage.
• Inflation - Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
• Mosquito - An insect that makes you like flies better.
• Raisin - Grape with a sunburn.
• Secret - Something you tell to one person at a time.
• Toothache - The pain that drives you to extraction.
• Tomorrow - One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
• Wrinkles - Something other people have. You have character lines.
• Yawn - An honest opinion openly expressed.